How to Avoid Change

      My parents grew up as Army brats, moving place to place, never settling- never finding their roots. A rolling stone collects no moss which is funny that during my childhood they should end up in the Pacific Northwest because everything collects moss there. Get lost in the woods there- don't look for the moss on the North side of the tree.
      The moss also grows on the West, South, and East side. And if you stand too long it will grow up your legs too.
         When they had me- what they wanted out of life and what it took to carve out an existence were on two separate ends of the stick- so they moved- often. It's a side effect of being poor.
           We moved every few years, about the time it took sensitive me to make a friend, it was time to put all my belongings in the vegetable and fruit boxes collected from the stores and become the 'New Girl' at school.
          And I didn't do 'New Girl' well when I was little. Heck, I don't do it well now.
          Damn insecurities. So God has been spending the last four months trying to push me out of my comfort zone.
         Stepping away from your comfort zone requires change.
         Something else I realized I'm not all that great at. I thought I was better with it, with my childhood of moving but nope, I hate it. Just about the time I find my place and it's fitting me like a well-worn slipper, something changes.
        Since I have spent the last four months quietly fighting the fire and the sharpening, I will give you my tips for avoiding change.

        1. Pretend it doesn't matter. If the change is something you can't handle, just pretend you don't care. Develop and master a shrug to give when someone brings it up.

        2. Lock your heart away and never give any part of it away. Or like on the TV show, 'Once'- learn how to take your heart out of your chest and bury it in the backyard. I love the fantasy aspect of that show, the scientist in me says, 'uhh, how can the blood move through your system without a heart?'

        3.  Learn the fine art of cussing at kids scooting down your sidewalk, while you water your yard and complain about the weather. Complaining about the weather is a great cover. You can bitch and moan about it being too cold or too hot. Too windy, too stale, too anything. It doesn't matter. Your heart doesn't hurt when you complain about the weather.

        4. Blog about avoiding change, so you can avoid further change. It's like a form of procrastination, but even better because you feel like you're doing something useful at the same time- giving advice- while still managing to avoid change.

       5. Refuse to move from your comfort zone until God pushes you out of it. And don't worry- God, the universe, the smarter part of ourselves,- is great at reminding us that we have to change to learn and grow. Otherwise, I suppose we end up like every rock and tree in the Pacific Northwest, covered in moss.

     6. Don't get a Gibson. Seriously, with a dog that chews up everything you own, including shoes, toys, and furniture, your environment is constantly changing on a daily basis. Also, you have to avoid growing attached to anything because it might be a chewed up mess of broken parts and dog drool the next morning. -But he's always sorry. It's not his fault that the expensive, unused baby diapers rip apart in such a fun way.

    7. Don't have children. Just about the time you get use to a stage- they change. Talk about change in motion. Childhood is a constant collection of changes, perhaps that's why we don't like to do anymore changing when we reach adulthood.

   So there you have it. Why I've been gone for three or four months without a peep. I've been avoiding changes. But I'm at a point where I can no longer avoid the changes coming -so here's my leap of faith- which for a writer always comes with the written word.

   Or perhaps I'll take my own advice and start to complain about the weather.

Day Twenty Five- Baby Jesus is Lost

   I know I'm a few weeks late on this blog entry. Writing twenty five entries in just twenty five days when I'm a full time Mom and Aunt was even more difficult than I had planned. But here we are, Day Twenty Five of Blessings but no where near the end of our journey on faith.
    I've actually learned a lot about myself on this digital journey. But I have to recommend, if you're going to take a honest look in the mirror, don't do it in December. The emotions already seem to be too stretched during this month and then you add in other stuff...it's like eating a third piece of pie when you're already stuffed. :)
   I've really enjoyed writing the stories...the moments...that have shaped who I am. The ones that reminded me of my faith or taught me to dig deeper into my faith to guide me. 
  There were some things I found I couldn't write about yet, perhaps in the next few months when winter is at its bleakest and I already feel dark and gloomy...I will tell you about when I was so sick that Death was literally waiting on the front porch for me and how it took a whole bunch of faith to overcome everything. But since I couldn't write about it last month, we'll see how long it takes me to explore how emotional damaging getting that sick can mess with a person.

    I feel extremely blessed to have the family and friends I do. Even though this last year has been difficult for my family and right now hero hottie and I feel like we want to take the next train out of Crazyville...I know what emotion drives my faith...LOVE.
    The Beatles had it, "All you need is love, love---Love is all you need.'

    Through the ups and downs; the little daily struggles and the monstrous I might die struggles; through the frustrations and the grief; the one thing I could hold in my heart, almost as if it was tangible was LOVE.

   Love for my family.  Love for hero hottie. Love for Bean and Abu. Love for canine critters that love back unconditionally. Love for God and all creation.

    Mary gave birth to the baby Jesus in a manger, surrounded not by the ideal environment to be laboring in but she had love.
   Jesus taught about faith, forgiveness, and love.

    One day CT, my niece was playing with the small wooden Nativity dolls I have and in her playing she misplaced the baby Jesus in the pile of presents under the tree. Suddenly, she is frantic, searching through the wrapped gifts.
   "Aunt Christy, the baby Jesus is lost underneath all the presents. Help me find him."

   I came to a shocking stillness and stared at her. She was simply speaking of the wooden baby Jesus doll lost in the presents but it was a stark reminder that even though presents are the fun part of Christmas... I do enjoy finding and giving the perfect present for someone...the true meaning of Christmas must never be lost underneath all the presents.
    Love. Forgiveness. Faith.

    They're some of the true gifts of Christmas.

   "Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."
    Matthew 6:19-21 TNIV

    Love, don't go on a journey of faith without it.