The End of the World by Zombie Apocalypse

I apologize for my tardiness in posting, I've been busy preparing for a possible zombie apocalypse and the end of the world in the same week. On top of being a Mom and writer, that makes for a very busy schedule. Do I wash the kids' clothes and try to get their grass stains out? Or do I let them watch Shaun of the Dead and Zombieland so they know how to survive brain eating, slowing moving, groaning pale people? I did not see any articles about 'How to Prepare Your Children for Zombie Attacks' in the parenting magazines. What's a Mom suppose to do?

And then there was the end of the world that was supposed to be last Saturday. Zombies and the end of the world. Two completely different scenarios to think about, which makes preparing difficult. If you have to prepare for a zombie apocalypse then you have to think about food, water, a brain protector because brains are zombie's favorite food, and perhaps where to find a huge get away truck, flame thrower and other zombie killing devices.
      If you're preparing for the end of the world you have to question yourself. Do you go and party for a week, give away all your money, and do things you normally wouldn't? Or do you act extra good, racking up brownie points to hand to Saint Peter at the Pearly Gates. Do you go out and help as many elderly women cross the street as possible, looking up into the sky and yelling that you just scored another point after each time?
     It's a tough question. Some people are going to forget all the rules and try to convince other people to join them. And other people are going to be really, really good in the hopes that they can avoid the other place opposite of heaven.
      Just so you know, I did neither. I don't have any life savings to give away to people predicting the end of the world and  who are already worth millions of dollars (which brings up an interesting question, if you're expecting to descend to heaven, why do you have people donate millions to you? Does Saint Peter take American dollars?) and I'm not going to use such a lame excuse as the end of the world to do something I wouldn't normally do. As far as counting my brownie points to enter the pearly gates, I'm pretty sure it doesn't quite work that way. But I do subscribe to the golden rule, including having forgiveness even when it's difficult to not be spitting angry at the woman who tried to run me over with her shopping cart at Safeway yesterday. (Yes, literally. She thought I was going to steal her spot in the check out line when all I was doing was trying to negotiate the tight spaces in the crowded aisle to reach the other side of the store, so she used her cart to block me, including pushing me out of the way with it when I tried to walk pass her. I was so mad. Still am, apparently.)

      To catch anyone up on the news and so you know what I'm talking about;  the Center for Disease Control's blog on May 16th (http://emergency.cdc.gov/socialmedia/zombies_blog.asp) wrote an entry about surviving a zombie apocalypse. Throughout the vast expanse of cyberspace it generated quite a buzz. Some people calling it a tongue in cheek article to grab the attention of people who wouldn't normally think about preparing for a 'regular and boring' disaster.  To another group of people thinking that the CDC is bluntly warning us about upcoming zombie attacks. (Of course, have you ever been to Wal-Mart or watched a teenage clerk try to count change nowadays? I think we've already had the zombie apocalypse.)
      Either way, on top of everything else I had to do this week, I needed to prepare for zombies. The CDC mentions the basics; water, food, medicines, copies of important papers and planning your escape. They left out the pick up truck, flame thrower, and shot gun. They also said that they would send in the scientists to solve the mysterious outbreak and cure the zombies. I don't recall a movie where the zombies are ever cured and usually the scientists are tasty morsels. So really, I would hate to be a low level CDC scientist during a zombie apocalypse. The odds aren't good. But if they want to be hopeful then good luck.

      The second item was Harold Camping predicting the end of the world last Saturday, even though in the nineties he had predicted the end of the world and obviously his prediction was incorrect. Millions, I mean millions of people around the world believed him. Donating their life savings to either his church or to charity, because they weren't planning on being here this week. Well, guess what. Saturday came and went and here I am blogging. Word of advice, no one can predict the end of the entire world. And if they want all your money to believe in them...run. The world is changing and things do seem chaotic but it's a shame that someone can scam so many people out of their money and their faith.

       I had hoped this week would be quieter but stormy weather brings horrible winds. I'm afraid for people in the mid-west that they have real problems to worry about. They don't need zombies and scam artists to destroy their world. I couldn't even imagine how you start repairing a town  (this week, Joplin, MO) that is almost completely damaged. How do you repair so many destroyed businesses, schools, houses, and the hospital? The footage just makes me cry.
       Life is fragile and precious. And being the idealistic person I am I would hope we never have a zombie apocalypse, I would wish that we wouldn't have scam artists anymore, and I pray that people find their hope again, even if it's buried underneath the rubble which used to be their lives.
      In the meantime I just read that Mr. Camping has a new prediction; the end of the world will be on October 21st. Which only gives me less than six months to start racking up my brownie points.